Monday, February 7, 2011

CSD Adventure Cleanse, Days 7 and 8.5: It's Not Always Easy Eating Green

Today, I feel like ass. Or maybe roadkill that's been backed over a few extra times. To top it off, the girl scout cookies came today to my office. Sigh. This is the part of the cleansing process where I have to rememeber: this is my choice. I can do this. No one is making me do this. When I am done, I will feel awesome. This is not punishment--this is renewal and transformation. And sometimes, trasformation hurts like a bitch and is uncomfortable as hell and it's OK. It's also OK to stockpile my girl scout cookies for another time. Or, give them away to someone who would really love them. It won't kill me, and there will be more next year.

It's not always easy eating green. There's a lot of pukeyness involved for me. Then again, I have to remember how far I've come. Two years ago at this time I was binge eating burger king, cheetos and quarts of ice cream. So hey, I am doing freaking awesome right now by comparison. This morning after I crankily finished my green smoothie (I was wishing it would transmogrify into vegan waffles with strawberries and vegan whip cream with a side of sage apple field roast sausage!), I noticed my tongue was a lovely shade of light green! Luckily, it went away. I was feeling like Kermit's angry doppleganger for a couple of minutes.

Ironically, Day 6 and most of Day 7 I felt amazing. Seriously, ecstatic wellbeing just oozing out of every pore. I had so much energy yesterday that I went hiking for the first time since my ankle surgery in 2008. And nothing bad happened!  I did not wrench my ankle on a rock. I did fine, although I hiked very slowly and carefully and kept it to about 45 minutes since I was also fasting that day. The fasting ended up becoming kind of difficult, which I was surprised by. I felt fine and dandy until about 8pm, at which point I became ravenously hungry, angry and totally unwilling to drink anything green, period. The eating disorder voices started yelling in my head, and I don't want to trigger that kind of behavior so I need to come up with a better plan for the next fasting day.

I must be better prepared if I want to fast, and I should probably end the night with something warm, like miso soup with vegetables so that I don't feel like beating someone's ass by the end of the day. I probably shouldn't juice fast all the way through until the next afternoon unless I feel very, very OK with that. I definitely didn't last night. Visions of Uncle Eddie's vegan cookies were dancing in my head.  Although hiking was amazing, it was probably a little too much activity. I'd be better off with yoga and a nice long sweat in the sauna at the gym on fasting days.

What I ate and did today:
Breakfast: green smoothie, green tea with yerba mate
Snack: apple juice with kamut grass powder and activated barley powder
Lunch: humgo green salad with carrots, purple cabbage, tofu crumbles and dressing
Snack: 2 ounces of wheatgrass and a handful of almonds
Dinner: sunshine burger with pickles and a little vegenaise, baked sweet potato fries with truffle salt and asparagus

In AM: meditation and affirmation
In PM: yoga, dry skin brushing, sinus flushing.

And yay, my 2oz of wheatgrass didn't make me almost hurl today! Progress, not perfection.

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